F*ck off and die - A sh*tty guide to getting through the f*cked up first month of a break up.

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Ep. 16 Breakups are hard but so are other penises

By Sarah Robinson on October 13, 2020

Sarah talks about crawling her way out of the dick sand, and goes through a bunch of wisdom harvested from Fuck off and die’s Instagram following (it’s really good!). Jade answers a listener question about what to do when coupled friends treat your broken love life as comedy fodder.

Our second breakup book

At around 25:30 Sarah shares how you can contribute to the next Fuck off and die break up book, by sharing your story of heart break (under 1,500 words) to sarah@fodbook.com. Anyone is welcome to share their story. Submissions can be in the form of a story, a poem, or however you like.

Your story can be about any kind of heartbreak, from breakups to losing a friend to saying goodbye to a much loved pet. Share your story and we will consider it for book number two! Head here for more info on submitting. (Please ignore any deadline info on the page linked above.)

Contributions to this breakup book can be made anonymously, or under a pseudonym. Each story will be illustrated with art from Jade. Chosen contributors will receive a free copy of the book to say thank you. We believe this book will help people going through heartbreak feel less alone.

Heartbreak is totally fucked, but to feel it means you have lived, and that makes you courageous. Share your story and let others know that they too can get out to the other side, and into the mother fucking light.

Part proceeds of breakup book sales will go to women escaping domestic violence.

Show notes

  • Sarah goes through an activity from the book called, ‘Breakups are hard but so are other penises’. Get the book here.
  • We asked our Instagram followers for breakup advice, and they dropped some amazing wisdom, because their smart AF.
  • Sarah talks about calling Lifeline when she’s struggling during a breakup. Their number is 13 11 14, and their support workers are available to speak 24/7.

Listener question

How do I stop my coupled friends treating my broken love life as comedy fodder?

  • Jade talks about why silver linings are fucked and unhelpful. Sarah agrees. (So does Brene Brown.)
  • Hey people in relationships, dating isn’t as fun as you remember! Here are some Tinder dating nightmares to refresh your memory.
  • Nanette Gadsby’s standup explores using yourself as comedy fodder. She stopped doing it and talks about this in her amazing show.
  • Here is a great article about the ‘ambiguous grief’ of being single.

What every coupled person should know when listening to their single friends talk about the loneliness of being single

PSB PSA (a PSB is a Perennially Single Bitch)

PSBs already know that all we can do while waiting for the right partner is to live a life of meaning, of love for family and friends, of passion and pursuit of beauty.

We got it. All we need—in addition to your hot friend’s number—is a little empathy for the pain, the isolation, the frustration, the exhaustion, the helplessness, the loneliness. (And all those bloody weddings.)

If a PSB tells you she is sick of singledom, if she is brave enough to tell you she is lonely, don’t rush into offering advice or compliments or strategies. Just say, “That must be hard. How are you doing?”

Read the full article by Briony Smith here.

Quotes

“You’re brave, it’s true. By accepting the breakup and deciding to keep going you’re embracing the unknown with open arms and that’s not something everyone can do.

Uncertainty is terrifying because there’s really no guarantee what will happen. However, let me share this quote with you that suck out to me: ‘When nothing is sure, everything is possible.’

So find solace in the fact that anything is possible for you right now. A lot of people would kill for that kind of freedom.”

/slowlyfadingg via Reddit, original quote by Margaret Drabble.

“Never love anybody who treats you like you’re ordinary.”

– Oscar Wilde.

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